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Posts Tagged ‘Apocalypse’

Google Play and the Fall of Civilization

March 20th, 2012 No comments

This weekend, I spent the better part of half an hour combing through my phone trying to find the fucking Android Market to download an app, and no, it wasn’t a literal 30 minutes, just like it wasn’t a literal lifetime that I spent waiting in the men’s department of some boutique in Soho (the men’s department being a lonely corner by the front door where likeminded men loiter while they dutifully await their significant others) for my girlfriend to find some ostensibly vital accessory, but it certainly felt like a fucking lifetime.  And so, after a metaphorical half-hour, it finally dawned on me that at some point in the preceding days, my Google Market app had been surreptitiously replaced by something called the Google Play Store. Rant On!

Apocalypse, Now!!

February 23rd, 2012 No comments

I’ve been patiently awaiting the apocalypse since the first somewhat-credible proclamation of Armageddon was made upon the close of the 20th century.  I use the term “credible” somewhat loosely, because short of a dinosaur-killing asteroid plunging toward the earth or Death and Famine and cohorts razing the city on horseback, you tend to take end-of-the-world proclamations with a grain or two of salt.  But under the circumstances, I considered it largely improbable, yet distinctly possible that if some fair number of systems upon which modern society was tethered to were to truly go belly-up (assuming we weren’t first disposed of entirely by ill-mannered nuclear missiles flying about with wild abandon) and planes started falling from the sky, society would ride a tidal wave of mass hysteria into some eventual state of primal civilization. Rant On!

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Steve Jobs: A Faust for the New Millennium

October 12th, 2011 2 comments

I’ve quietly maintained, over the years, a list of individuals (persons of some celebrity or notoriety foremost, but not completely discounting a few personal acquaintances) who I’m convinced have, at some point, traded their souls to Satan in exchange for power and influence.  For brevity’s sake, I’m not of a mind to discuss the entire list here (which would go on for volumes, anyway), but I will begin simply by starting at the top, and (at the risk of inciting the wrath of so-called tech “journalists” and self-described aficionados, the popular media, celebrities, legions of hipster assholes, and Stephen Colbert), that distinction belongs to Steve Jobs. Rant On!